Navigating Chaos: Finding Joy and Focus in a Raging World
Well, I’m back after an unanticipated month-long hiatus. Life just piled a bunch of must-see-to tasks on top of me, and I’ve been slowly crawling out from under them. One was adjusting to a recent diabetes diagnosis for my elderly dog. This has been an exercise in “getting comfy with discomfort.” I hate causing my loved ones pain, and my dog often yelps and jumps the minute he feels a needle touch his skin. It’s stressful for me and for him (safety), but it’s either inject him with insulin twice daily or watch his physiological condition rapidly deteriorate. Not only does he not deserve that sort of neglect, caring for him might actually become more difficult as symptoms progress, so it ultimately behooves me to adapt to giving insulin. After over a month, I think I’ve finally gotten the hang of it.
During my absence, if I’m to believe news reports or my social media feed, the U.S. has started heading towards hell in a hand basket. If you’re reading this from the future or from outside the U.S., ten days ago political media personality Charlie Kirk was assassinated, and this event has had repercussions. Though I have opinions on political questions, no matter which side of the political spectrum you are on, I will more-or-less agree with your opinions and then try to steer the conversation to lighter topics. I take this attitude for two reasons. One is that I am a people person who has spent a considerable amount of time in liberal areas and in conservative areas. I love (social) and respect (esteem) my liberal and conservative friends and family equally, and I know that they often have the same values even if they have different ideas on the path needed to reach a particular goal. The other is that even if I have opinions on political matters, I am mostly apolitical. Yes, government policy affects me. I have a stellar voting record because I feel that voting matters. However, no matter what the policies are, I’m going to do my best to meet the Six Needs of myself and my family, and often times meeting those needs is a mental game. In the end, it’s about controlling what you can control and accepting anything beyond your control (the Four Stages of an Event). As it happens so much is beyond my control, and for the most part I’ve made peace with that fact.
I find it healthy to keep an eye on the general pulse of the nation by giving myself a limited amount of time with the news and my social media accounts. If this country is going to burn, I want to know so I can try to hide the fam away and hope we survive until the dust settles (I feel like I’ll be an asset in re-building efforts even if only as a cheerleader). However, to me it’s a waste of time to wallow in the muck (so-called doomscrolling). I’d rather spend my time on productive pursuits that leave me with a sense of satisfaction (e.g. my must-see-to list). And, look, we’re already back to “feed what you want to grow.”
So on that note, I’ll share a few of the things that are in my domain of control and bringing me delight while the world appears to be raging around me:
I recently (re-)discovered a class of video games called cozy games. I’m currently bouncing between two of them: Honey Grove and Hello Kitty Island Adventure. Past Me viewed these sorts of games as a total waste of time because they’re not terribly challenging. In fact, Honey Grove is a game that my 5 year old plays as effectively as I do. After playing them for a certain amount of time, I’m not sure I’ve actually gained anything from the time spent with them. However, what I like about them is that I can visit the games whenever I want. I can go a week without opening the game, and I haven’t been penalized in any way, and, because there is not much to them, I can immediately pick up where I left off. I also like that I can play them for five or ten minutes and easily put them down again. They provide the mindless break I need when, let’s say, I’ve been around screaming kids for two hours.
I just finished watching the first season of Resident Alien. It’s not the best show out there (some of the plotting in the first season is a little clunky), but I laughed harder than I have in a long time while watching a television series. Alan Tudyk is so joyfully creepy as the alien (I hear Whoopi Goldberg’s voice as the hyena in The Lion King: “I hear that name and I shudder.” “Mufasa.” shuddering “Ooh…. Do it again!”).
Mr. Transportation regularly travels through Anchorage, and one of the gift shops at the airport carries this Samovar tea I love. I was running low, and I asked him to grab some more the next time he passed through. He returned home with a bag of the normal tea and two bags of the decaf version. I’d never had the decaf version, and my initial reaction was negative. One of the aspects I love of black tea is the caffeine! I couldn’t imagine anything good coming of decaf black tea. I was so wrong. The decaf version is even richer in flavor than the regular version, and I have zero guilt about drinking it at any time of day! Low expectation + great outcome = one very happy writer.
Because I’d often spend more time working out what music to put on than actually listening to the music, a few months ago I started picking out eight artists, albums, or playlists to focus on for the month ahead. Two of the categories are new-to-me music: an artist who is visiting my city in the coming month (just in case I should act on a whim to catch live music) and an artist or album I’ve heard about but haven’t listened to (I keep a list as I hear or read positive reviews). I’ve been pleasantly surprised by my random picks for these categories. This month’s pick for “positively reviewed” was the Monster in Paris soundtrack. That movie came out in 2011, so I’ve obviously been keeping this list for some time. I’ve never seen the movie, but I’m enjoying the music in spite of (or because of?) the fact that it’s not my usual fare.
I hope you are finding space for joy in your life these days. If so, what is giving you that joy? I’d love to hear your recommendations!